 The water was icy cold, the kind which takes your breath away. Each time she tried to place her face in the water and take a forward crawl stroke, her body contracted into itself. The large, inflatable orange buoy seemed so far away. And that was only the first one on a 750 meter course in the freezing June waters of Keuka Lake in central New York State.
The fears that plagued Amy Moritz took the form of gremlin-like voices in her head, whispering their disapproval.
Who do you think you are to do a triathlon? You’re not an athlete. You’re too fat. You’re too old to start this. Everyone thinks you’re crazy. And now, see, you’re not even going to make it through the swim. Failure. Everyone will know that you tried and failed. And now you’re disappointed. See. I told you never to try.
But she inched closer to that first buoy, doing a doggy-paddle over to the first canoe she saw.
She eyed the next buoy and did the best thing she could think of -- she turned on her back to float.
“I knew I could float in my wetsuit. It was like my shield of protection, so I started counting out 10 backstrokes and would then turn over to see if I was going in the right direction. I was blessed to have a lifeguard name Ashley follow me on her surfboard. She made it her mission to get me through the course, even as I wondered if calling for a water rescue would be that bad.”
Amy didn’t call for a water rescue. She kept floating and paddling her way until her foot hit shore. She was the last swimmer out of the water that day. But that no longer really mattered to her.
 Nine months earlier, she didn’t know how to swim. But after spending time with the staff of Women’s Quest, the idea of completing a triathlon grabbed hold of her imagination. As a sportswriter for 10 years, Amy had always been around athletics, but she never found herself part of the competition. She lived on the sidelines, the perpetual observer, being helpful and insightful but longing to be in the action.
It took two retreats with Women’s Quest -- Adventures in Body and Soul and cycling in Italy -- before she finally decided it was time to try her hand at triathlon. The first order of business was learning to swim.
“People asked me why I didn’t start with a duathlon. I told them learning to swim was just a detail. The bravado I had in public hid my fear and insecurity, not just that I couldn’t learn to swim but that as a woman in my mid 30s it was too late for me to become an athlete.”
Amy took adult swimming lessons at a local recreational pool and it took months before her swim workouts went beyond bobbing and floating drills. It turned ou, those simple drills helped get her through that first open water triathlon.
Once on land and on the comfort of her bike, Amy smiled through the rest of the day.
“To most people, that swim would best be described as a disaster and it certainly wasn’t pretty. But it was exactly what I needed. I needed to understand that I could push beyond my comfort zone and survive. I wasn’t going to break. I wasn’t going to fail. In fact, my definition of failure changed. It was no longer dependent on what others thought failure was. Failure to me was not trying. The goal was really not the finish line, but being confident enough to show up at the starting line.”
The experience awakened the athlete in Amy. She went on to complete in other sprint distance triathlons that year, sometimes struggling through the swim, sometimes putting her face in the water and actually covering distance in a recognizable freestyle stroke.
Hooked on endurance sport, she continued to train and search for new challenges. Her second year in the sport, she completed a marathon and a 70.3 race. This September, her third year as a triathlete, she finished an Iron Distance race in Montreal.
“When I first started doing triathlons I always backed away from any thought of doing an Ironman event. Those people were just crazy. They were athletes. Super athletes in a way. But once something creates a spark, catches my attention, I find myself drawn to it. I’ve learned to follow those sparks. They always lead to the most amazing places.”
Following her desire into endurance sports has opened up other opportunities for Amy. She shares her story of passion, patience and perseverance both as a daily blogger (www.amymoritz.com) and as a speaker. Her experiences enrich her already deep understanding of women’s sports and women’s athletics.
“I find if I’m connected, if I’m really paying attention to my heart’s desire, it automatically leads me into a wild and precious life -- one that I would never have been able to dream for myself.” |
